The Dating Manifesto (Part 1) | carol_herbert

The last weekend i drove up to Kuala Lumpur for a conference that was held at Glad Tidings Petaling Jaya. The conference was all about dating and how we suck at it and how we get our games on back. It was a hard reality check for most singles’ as the point Lisa(the speaker) told us was like a slap on the face. I mean like a wake up call sort of. She started by talking about how your love life sucks or you don’t even have a love life. Below are the valid reasons why :-

  1. You’re waiting for THE ONE! (This is just plain crazy.We are so highly influenced by media that we are so focused that we are destined to THE ONE and he will come through our path some how and we will know it or assume God will bring one. The understanding is just wrong. Even i got it wrong. There isn’t such a One but find One and make the person your ONE. See the difference? It is based on your mind and how you see it from maturity. When love comes,you will be blinded. Always make sure you choose wisely. There will be baits so called guys coming after you. But you can’t just wait at the corner for the ONE to come and say he is the One. What if he isn’t? Many things can happen but when you take One and own it and make it yours, it will make a difference.
  2. You haven’t grown up yet!(This applies to all. You could be 40 years old but still act like a child. Suck it up. You need to grow and mature. Think ahead. Plan ahead. Not just simple date and say bye the next minute. Boys be a man. Ladies be a woman. Guys , you mainly need to do more stuff. Examples like holding the door , paying for the meal(i mean like for the few dates that you are still getting to know her or interested in her), lead things and be a gentleman. Lisa told one thing that was on point. We woman are independent and we can stand on our legs but still when it comes to a date, men needs to lead and be domain. Don’t ever let the girls take out her purse to pay unless you are really broke .. HA HA.. anyways,, just be a gentleman lah..It would hurt right? In a relationship or family, the man leads and the woman summits herself to him. It isn’t vice versa you know. Read your bible people. I wouldn’t want to date a guy where i am the one always planning and leading. It is exhausting you know.
  3. You aren’t dating!(This is so me..haha..I mean i have invites, but i tend to not go. I reject some guys just because I am not just into them. You get what i meant. But it was so wrong. I am limiting guys from me and it is bad. You can reject but not until you reject all. Even guys,please i know that you are sometimes afraid of commitments and stuff but come on!! It is just dinner and getting to know one another.Lisa made it clear that you can reject (i mean the girls) but then what if the there isn’t any guys asking the girls out. Is that another problem? So complicated right? That is why we don’t go on dates. We both(girls and guys) analyze stuff too much and keep rejecting and keep not asking people out is such a big mistake. Go out and have fun. Life is short. But always remember to do it with God’s fear.
  4. Your dating is directionless! (Date someone when you have the intention to marry. Or maybe there is a direction towards where you are planning to. Don’t date with no focus. Don’t date just because you feel lonely. Date with commitment. It is serious guys. If you are heading towards your 30s’ , you will know how desperate it is to know that your friends are all getting babies and married and you are still at the same spot doing nothing. Date with a same passion. Date with having the same heart to serve God.
  5. You’re stuck in a friendlationship! (Friendzone case. We are kinda living in society where everyone is your friend. Even guys. You can do stuffs with them. Hang out and talk serious business. But this kind of friendship might be dangerous. We need to at least filter and give space . If every guy is your friend , you will never go on dates , like a one to one. Because the guy will feel the same, as you..I am just hanging out* so what is the big deal right? So it is tough but yea, girls please..get a life..not all can be friends..Limit and filter and maybe some will ask you out.

The full explanation you can read up from here. Check out the organization(Boundless) to help all single people out there that are lost.

http://media.focusonthefamily.com/boundless/pdf/dating-manifesto-chapter-4.pdf

 

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