If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
To me repentance is such a big thing. Imagine sinning!! Oh my world!! Yes we human beings are always prone to temptations and sin. We tend to fall over and over again. Do we ever realize , especially Christians that we are really really hurting and annoying God? God has already sent HIS awesome precious son to die for us and suffer , yet we still are falling into pit holes. I dare say I myself fall into that damn holes like lots of times and asking for forgiveness for kinda easy. As I tend to get older, I learned about the word repentant and coming clean with God. It suddenly strike me that I was doing it all wrong.
Teenager times and to be specific, I was indeed a mess. I knew that I was serving an ALMIGHTY GOD who knows every single SHIT that I did and lil did I know HE was like protecting me although I hurt him so badly. I was indeed serving in church and have my ‘feet’ in certain ministries. But still I didn’t feel that I was fully utilized well. There was more than serving and I knew I was doing it all wrong. Then the day came, when a pastor preach about the real meaning of REAL repentance. It really broke my heart to every bits of it. Confession was another thing. How do you confess and how genuine was it? Too many questions to be asked and only you can answer it for yourselves. I was leading a double role life to be precise. It was tough and I was asking God to forgive for all the wrong things i did and said but still i think God is just sometimes fed up of me. Keep going back to the old SHIT wasn’t fun and it is just breaking your faith even more. God never gave up on me and I knew that he will still guide me through. I am nothing without HIM and I am completed by His touch.
So I managed to pick myself up and told God I was ready to repent for real and have a clean and pure life for HIM. I knew the path was hard and I will fall some how but that is HIS way of teaching us life. He will indeed never leave us and is for us. He has his open arms and will catch us every single time we fall. He has been raised to life to bring us life. What more could we ask for? To me it was a price paid unlimited and I am truly blessed that I have this amazing God that loves me so so much. Being a leader was tough as you know that you have all eyes on you and every single mistake you make will be judged some how. To be honest we are all hypocrites. I am saying as I have experienced so many things and dare say Christians need to be careful in what they do and say. We are not limited to whatever we do but still the flesh tends to react the opposite than the soul isn’t it? I managed to be myself and surrender all to HIM 😀 He has taught me a lot on love , compassion and slow to anger. Many didn’t know that I was a very hot-tempered person. It’s just I didn’t really show it outside. I kept all inside and vented on myself by all thoughts which is much displeasing I could say. Adding to that, I was an introvert. Being an introvert and a hot-tempered person at the same time was a horrible feeling. Thank God I overcame those and I have a freed mind and soul. No more pain will be staying for long and I am more patient as I could be compared to last time.I have shared a lil of my stories like to a certain friend and she is indeed a great listener. She is such a great friend to me and a great woman of GOD. She has encouraged me a lot and I am always thankful for HER 🙂LET GO AND LET GOD!! it’s the phrase I love the most. Have faith and stay strong for HE is able. You don’t have to worry or be afraid. Joy comes every morning and always stay blessed no matter what happens.Troubles don’t last long.I love this song so much as it is the song that reflects the REDEEMER 😀
“My Redeemer Lives”
His blood has covered my sin
I believeMy shame He’s taken away
My pain is healed in his name
‘Cause my Lord has conquered the grave
My Redeemer Lives
My Redeemer Lives
My Redeemer Lives
‘Cause My Lord has conquered the grave
I’ll rise with You
I’m dancing on this mountain top to see your kingdom come